I dont know what to do anymore, I keep thinking it’s going to get better by it never does, does it? I don’t usually put things like this online but I need to vent somewhere because I don’t want me friends to worry. I have so many more problems no then I used to, and people are always looking at me saying ‘you dont have any problems’, which tells me I’m a bette actress than I thought I was. What do you do when you don’t have a place you feel like you can relax? When your scared to go to school, home, work? Always the people judging you and saying things, the worst thing is I’m one of those people that overthinks everything and overanalyzes everything said to her. I hate hating myself, I hate all the things I’ve done to myself because I don’t think I deserve to be happy. I figure me out, I push the people closest to me away because I don’t think I deserve to be happy. And I’m always sad, I’m depressed but no one believes me. I researched the symptoms of depression, I could be the poster child for it. I’m sick and tired of always being sad. I’m sick of only dreaming about dieing or what it would be like if I was someone totally different. I want hugs, they make me feel like people aren’t scared to touch me. And I know it’s cliched but I need a boyfriend, I’m all for girls don’t need a man, but longer I go without one the more my mind tells me there is something wrong with me and that I need to be different than who I am. I just need people.